There's a girl I've been seeing for a long time, like, knowing of her existing I mean, we don't talk, I don't even know her name. At first I thought she look funny, kinda like a grandma, we're the same age and her outfits are modern but she just gives me grandma vibes and that was all at first, recently I started to notice her more and I think I now like her but the other day I saw her up close and I freaked out
asked by someone ·
12 replies
- the person who asked
She looks just like a younger version of my grandma. I hate my grandma, she's always been mean and manipulative, now, I know nothing about this girl, I guess I started to notice her for her looks but I'm grossed out since it means I'm sexually attracted to her, nothing wrong with that until I noticed how much she looks like my grandma. So now I'm confused and disgusted
- someone who replied
Interesting. Sounds like you’ve got a lot rolling around in your head. Maybe this resemblance to your grandma is an additional sign that makes it worth exploring who this person is and getting to know them. Do you want to talk to her and if so what’s holding you back from talking to her?
- the person who asked
I don't know if I do, like, she's just physically attractive now but why? I used to think she looked funny not long ago, and if now heir looks are the main attraction then I want nothing to do with it since I have the idea she looks like my grandma, she might not look that much like her but in my mind she does. The idea that she looks like MY grandma is recent, but I thought she looked like a grandma since day 1
- someone who replied, again
Interesting. Do you think it would help you form a more informed opinion about who this person is if you were to talk to them and get to know them?
- the person who asked
Maybe
- someone who replied, again
I’m pushing the talking to her because it’s easy to create stories about who or what people are and it’s easy to ruminate and create a bunch of preconceived notions about them and us. Talking to her can help you seek to understand why you are drawn to or curious about that person.
- someone who replied, again
Making an interaction with this individual and giving the opportunity to experience each others unique gifts to the world and each other is truly a beautiful thing. Then the perceptions and questions fall away. If it’s worth the associated mental energy you spend thinking about her, I’d recommend it!
- the person who asked
Well, it's just looks ig
- someone who replied, again
Yeah. Certainly not everything. Talking to her doesn’t mean you want to bang your grandma I can assure you of that! It’s just life. Nobody gets it.
- the person who asked
You sure? It's all toi weird tbh
- someone who replied, again
There are a lot of weird things in the world but it’s always weirder if it’s only in your head. When acting through these scenarios in real life with others I usually find out that I’m way off with my judgements and I learn something about myself and other people
- the person who asked
A memory just popped up, as a little kid, most surely younger than 5, I was obssesed with women's breats, I'd call them "little ballons" and my mom used to sometimes let me play with hers but when she wasn't in the mood or just physically away my grandma would let me play with hers, she's my mom's mother in law. God, I've never told anyone about this and I feel so bad, so dirty
