Today was the worst day for my mental health, and anxiety. Depression is always present but some days my anxiety is better than others. Today I thought about death- not suicide, but just wished I had never been born. I started a new job and it was my third day and I just feel so lost in what it is i have to do. Got into a massive fight with my sister who was always verbally abusive, and found out I might have COVID.:(
asked by someone ·
19 replies
- someone who replied
Huh. That's a lot going on in your life! I can see how you could feel overwhelmed. Somwtimes the brain goes to death or suicide as a potential 'out' - even if we are not committed to it. I used to experience that a lot. It can be scary. Are you excited about your new job?
- the person who asked
Hi, thanks for the reply. Not entirely if I'm honest. I had a very bad previous experience in this field and it still triggers a lot of anxiety to me.
- someone who replied, again
Ok. Kudos to you for going back at it! That takes courage. Do you feel supported? Like if you have a concern do.poeple listen to you in your daily life and then at your job?
- the person who asked
I have my best friend but feel like I'm putting too much on her shoulders with my issues which only makes my anxieties worse. With work I'm pretty new but feel like I'm bothering them anyway with any questions I have.. i just overall feel like a burden.
- someone who replied, again
Glad you have a supportive friend. Do you work with a professional or counselor? Also, does your work have an HR department?
- the person who asked
Yes it does. And I have been looking for a counselor recently again, someone I can connect with. Wished in person was an option however.
- someone who replied, again
Good! Sounds like you are taking a lot of proactive steps. Does it feel like people see or recognize the effort and progress you put in?
- the person who asked
I haven't actually told anyone, because I think they're tired of hearing I'll make the changes I never actually make and I didnt need the added stress..
- someone who replied, again
Hum. So you have experiences these feelings before. What's different now? You sound like you are motivated to make a change
- the person who asked
Cuz it's been years and I fear losing loved ones over my many issues. I don't want to end up like my dad alone and angry
- someone who replied, again
Can I ask if you are a male or female? Also, do you feel like you've burned bridges? You said you've never told anyone, about your recent progress or overall? Like you've never told anyone how you feel or ask for help?
- the person who asked
I'm 27f. And I haven't told them about the recent one because I always go through a really bad phase (usually when I drink for a few days consecutively) where I feel utter guilt and shame and tell them I'm guna seek help and complain and cry etc. Until my better days I feel completely fine but in reality I havent healed, just "forgot it" in a sense
- the person who asked
I definitely have burned many bridges but I always feel like those bridges weren't mine to walk on to begin with. Theres no one I lost that I wished I hadn't. I feel anyone I've lost I wasn't meant to have to begin with. I'm a very rational person with great communication skills but have childhood traumas Idk how to fix and forgiveness issues.
- someone who replied, again
You sound self aware and open. Do you believe you have the skills and tools to overcome these challenges?
- the person who asked
I'm not sure because I still have a lot of anger, resentment and idk how to forgive anyone including myself.
- someone who replied, again
I'm not a professional so there are probably more skilled ppl out there for that. But sounds like you are working with someone. What have you tried in terms of forgiveness?
- the person who asked
Idk. If I don't care about them that much I just, leave and don't speak to them. If I care I usually brush it under the rug as to not upset them until I drink and it comes out
- someone who replied, again
Ever tries focused forgiveness or living kindness meditation?
- the person who asked
I've never heard of those
