I feel like I’ve put all of my eggs in 1 basket: building my family. I give everything to my kids, house, husband and don’t have much left for friends, hobbies, etc. It’s lonely. My husband has admitted to things that have really hurt me and when I say it hurts, he says I’m making him feel bad. Where do I turn to? I feel like I have no one. I love my kids and will continue giving them my best - but I feel like I’ve lost everything else.
asked by someone ·
6 replies
- someone who replied
I’m sorry this is happening. Sounds like you are really trying your best. Did he apologize? Or is he just ignoring it? And what did you used to have that you no longer have? Are you grieving the loss of it or are you hoping to restore it back into your life?
- the person who asked
He did. I am still feeling a breach of trust and I’m grieving the loss of life we used to have. Grieving the person I used to be, a free fun and interesting person, whereas now I’m just a mom. I parent I clean. I’m home. I’m not interesting and so he’s not interested in me. And how do I even change that? I am with children nearly all of the time. That or I’m home cleaning. Of course he’s not interested in me.
- someone who replied, again
How come you cannot be fun and interesting with children? I’m not invalidating what you are saying I’m just genuinely curious why having children and this role means you cannot be fun and interesting
- the person who asked
I am always with kids or cleaning my house. I’m rarely doing anything else. My head is filled with their needs wants passions, our schedule, what groceries we need, what clothes are clean, naps, and I don’t have energy for much else. So that’s not interesting or fun to talk about to anyone else.
- someone who replied, again
Do you care about what you are offering and providing? Is it enough for you or is it that the people around you won’t recognize it so there is no point in continuing to give to them?
- the person who asked
I care for my kids. I’m giving my all all of the time. It’s never good enough. I’m not a good cook, the house is still messy. I haven’t managed to hold a baby and entertain the older ones and still cook impeccable meals and keep an immaculate house and also homeschool and forest school and workout and read. I spend all of the energy trying my best and since I can’t offer value to my husband or my old friends, everyone is gone.
