beginning of August, the girl I love and i broke up, I had to move out, I felt like I was losing her and the 3 year old.aup until two days ago We haven't talked, we haven't seen each other. I tried to reach out but she is not ready. People say that I have to wait for her to reach out to me. But I've been feeling alone, my great grandfather passed last week. I want to pursue her because she is the one I want, and im willing to do anything.
asked by someone ·
14 replies
- someone who replied
I’m sorry to hear about your loss. Longing is a hard feeling to feel. Seems like when it rains it pours, huh? What is it about her that you want to hold on to? And what was the reason for the breakup?
- the person who asked
She was loving, she was supportive(even with the things that pissed a her off cause it made me happy she said), she is an amazing and caring mother. We broke up because of my issues, I didn't prioritize, I played video games more than anything else, I did no growing, I kept my faith with her, but I didn't communicate properly, I was holding on to my old habits and not compromising, not trying to be the best father I could be.
- the person who asked
Me and her both could've had better communication. But now that me and her have broken up, and have been for more than a month and a half. Ive been doing the things that I shouldve done in the relationship. She wants space, but I dont want to miss a moment with her and the kid, I love them both.
- the person who asked
I didn't know what I wanted, I just thought I could move in with her to get away from my family drama, now that I know what I want, I dont know what to do besides wait, but even thats painful, and some people keep telling me she isn't worth it, that I need to move on, that I can't rely on her for happiness. I dont think I am though, its simply that I just want to be with her and the child. And that I am willing to do whatever it takes.
- someone who replied, again
That’s beautiful. Thanks for sharing. Have you communicated that sentiment in a way that is not pressuring her or serving your own needs? Like have you communicated that in a way that she would be comfortable to receive it? Sometimes the way we want to express ourselves is not the way someone else wants to receive it
- the person who asked
Its always came off how she didn't want to receive it. She told me today that she wants me out of her life completely. Now it really is just depending on if she messages me. But I'm devastated, I dont know how I can be happy being this way.
- someone who replied, again
Yeah. That’s hard to hear. Did you try and tell her face to face or on the phone? Text?
- someone who replied, again
Sometimes I think letters and written word are powerful and cathartic
- the person who asked
There's nothing else I can do to talk to her, she has made up her mind, if she ever comes back to me in the future, ill jump back into it. But now I have to find a different purpose for myself, to keep myself happy, but that is difficult as well.
- someone who replied, again
You sound like you’ve got some confidence and clarity around the situation. How are you doing these days?
- the person who asked
I kind of do, kind of dont, I miss her and the kiddo. Theres nothing I can do about it though. Just trying to make it through, constantly waking up in the mornings upset.
- someone who replied, again
What are the things you are upset about?
- the person who asked
Just that im losing time with her and the kid
- someone who replied
Have any healthy middle ground like phone calls or zoom calls to keep in touch while allowing you both to move on? Or are you grieving the loss of that relationship and needing some space to reflect and move on? There need not be shame involved, especially if you learned from this relationship. Then it’s all part of the process that contributes to you being able to live a life you want to live
